Take it easy, but take it
Change is hard, bring ease to it.
As we near the first full year of Feral Soul (next week’s post will be our shared birthday!), we pause for some help to meet ourselves in change. The change of living our worth isn’t easy — so bring some ease to it. (psst, it’s unlikely anyone else will)
Who knows how social media algorithms get us in slots for particular goods or services? But a clothing maker named Western Aloha landed in my corral, and I landed in theirs. They make some cool things, but their tagline drew my admiration. I’m terrible at setting an intention (which is all the rage), but this one rang true: “Take it easy, but take it.”
The notion that living our worth, doing life mindfully, or being self-compassionate is taking an easy way out might be an assumption we make. But becoming aware of our emotional weather and the effects of our long-standing habits will unleash some truths we’ve perhaps been avoiding. Their weight and the patterned routine of their practice will show us that change is a lifetime's work. Entering our healing process and becoming aware of the work to be done will mean things often get worse before they get better.
James Baldwin said it best “Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”
So, why bother? I mean, if our being stuck is so challenging to overcome, why not resign ourselves to our factory presets or live out the destiny of our ancestral conditioning? Because hope says, we don’t have to. The resurrecting newness of grace invites a new life, which means new living. Like all things, we will change anyway, so why not give our change some godly direction? And godly direction is based on love and compassion. Exercising it in ourselves will help us have a foundation to share it.
If we commit to healing, the journey will undoubtedly be rocky. Healing isn’t linear nor experienced on a constant upward slope. This is where self-compassion and patience become the essential fuels for our travel forward. But, unfortunately, our minds, conditioned to be hard on ourselves, judge at every turn and will meet these fuels with suspicion.
Unfortunately, we have an inner food critic writing a food review while the meal is still being brought to our table. As we’re in the process of change, our problem-solving minds tend to judge, compare and grade our efforts while they’re in faltering baby steps forward. Although helpful in some things, this will undoubtedly saddle us with an even more significant challenge than the effort of change already represents.
In Lighter, Yung Pueblo writes:
A common challenge is trying to measure your progress while you are in the midst of the process. You don’t want to judge yourself when you are feeling particularly stormy, as your perspective is clouded.
Mindfulness will allow you and me to note when we’re in a low moment physically, mentally, or spiritually. Seeing that the present moment is a more significant uphill climb for reasons we didn’t expect or can’t put a fine point on is a moment to be self-compassionate. The first act of noting is a subtle but indispensable help. You’re not low because you’re failing; you’re just down now.
Pueblo shares:
Recognizing the down moment and using it as a signal to embody patience toward yourself and others is a sign of your growing wisdom. It will also help you refrain from doing things you will later regret or getting into any illogical arguments because your inner tension was pushing you to fight. Focusing on moving gently through your day while your mind goes through its storm is not a matter of being fake or suppressing your emotions. It is a matter of honoring a greater range of your reality. Yes, you don’t feel great, but you also understand that fueling this fire by adding tension on top of your existing tension won’t make anything better. Your only beneficial option is to feel the heaviness of your truth and not add any more weight to what your mind is already working on releasing.
Stay in it
Stirring up the still waters of our habits will unavoidably make the water murky. It’s not a cue to give up or backtrack. It’s a cue to honor the work you’re invested in as a legitimate struggle. No one is saying this is easy or the effort is a cakewalk. Bow to the opponent of your past and admit it’s got some fight in it. After all, that’s the classy warrior you are.
Pueblo concludes:
So stay committed to your healing, but be gentle with yourself. When we take up the inner journey, we are accepting the challenge to evolve and flourish.
Said more succinctly: Take it easy, but take it.
Be well, Feral Souls. And plan on cake next week!