This is an end-of-summer clearance sale. When we’re coming out of seasons into new ones, it’s good to survey what we’ve learned, gained, or lost as we move on. So this will be part collection, part list, and all annoying for someone who might be here for a concise, single-topic entry into our journey on the subject of self-worth.
A daily practice for “never enoughers”
First haikus. There will be no wild praise for these literary nuggets; they’re an odd and very niche art form, and traditionally, they’re not even meant to be shared. However, the daily practice of writing haiku has tremendously helped this maximizer.
A haiku is a three-lined poem restricted to a specific number of syllables per line. The opening line: five syllables, second line seven, last line five. So, 5-7-5. And those constraints are maddening at first but give way to a liberation. Let me explain.
As someone who tries to squeeze every last drop of production from a moment and severely judges themselves for falling short when a day ends, I realize the deep personal cost I’m voluntarily paying for the unchanging limits of reality.
Every day has limits; things won’t be as good as possible. We live in limits. As humans, constraints are us. Every moment, we make choices to convey ideas, accomplish things, and move life along, and when the sun sets, we look over it all and might think, “That could’ve been better.” The resulting churn of dissatisfaction has served us to try again, but it’s put us out in brutal emotional weather. The toll mounts, and our once-motivating dissatisfaction spills into a pervasive mood about everything. Everything could be better! Grrrr. Here comes Mr. Fun.
So, each day, I sit before a blank piece of paper and jumpstart my creativity, trying to put a coherent idea down. Over the next three to five minutes, I make choices and edits, grieve over words I can’t include (too long or eating up too many syllables), and wince at words I do include. Finally, I usually find a moment of satisfaction and rest in what has come to be in the world. What my mind, unmoored to a creativity-destroying screen, has birthed. I’m then hopeful the practice will map across the remainder of my limit-filled day. I’ll be okay with what has become, even with limits.
Haiku might sound like a nightmare to you. My broader encouragement is for you to find a daily practice, whatever it is, to bring you to terms with limits (different from term limits which may never happen).
This brings me to a quote that bowled me over:
"And God said, Love your enemy, and I obeyed Him and loved myself."
Kahlil Gibran
Our self-sabotage is pretty well crafted, and excavating the pillars of it can take time and deep digging.
IRL (in real life)
I met a reader/listener in the real world. A friend I’ve known for many years introduced me to her husband, and he was very encouraging. Hello Bob and Linda! Thanks for being along for this thing.
This newsletter, podcast, blog, Substack thingie is part experimental and mostly my weekly commitment to bring forward something that might someday be material for in-person spiritual retreats. But engaging with folks who’ve found some resource with it in its present form — is fun.
Joy next
It was in this past season that I committed to investigate joy. I wrote about it here. Knowing the human raincloud I can be and the humor I use to mask it, it has to be God’s sense of humor that I would be inspired to pursue this topic. While the inspiration has had multiple sources, the quote that brings it all together is “God made us because He thought we’d enjoy it.”
Clearance bin music and a quote
The song below features a quote (in what the kids call a drop) from Twin Peak’s character Agent Dale Cooper. It shows his approach to joy in life. It reminds me of morning coffee in my ‘travel’ mug. Some mugs allow us to take them places, but this hefty pottery from East Fork Pottery takes me places. It’s truly a travel mug. The coffee brewed with beans from far-flung places like Ethiopia and Columbia, roasted in places like Boston and Nashville, comes to me from Trade Coffee.
I leave with it a link to the song and a few links in the clearance bin. Don’t assume that because something is affordable, it’s not valuable. I hope you find something helpful.
Here’s what Agent Cooper says:
I’m going to let you on a little secret. Everyday, once a day, give yourself a present. Don’t plan it, don’t wait for it, just let it happen. Could be a new shirt in a men’s store, a cat nap in your office chair, or two cups of good hot black coffee, like this. Man that hits the spot. Nothing like a good hot cup of black coffee.
Be well, Feral Souls.
I love this! It’s like searching for that one item in a thrift store I can’t leave behind, and finding it!